This one’s for the girls…

Boys have cooties. Until you are 30, with a college education, a career and a prenuptial agreement.

Be careful who you let kiss you – as to you it may mean everything, to them, it may just be a swapping of spit.

Know that you have to be happy with who you are and love yourself before you can truly love and be loved by someone else. Know that what you think of yourself is more important than what others think of you. Those that talk about you behind your back (or to your face) are just taking out their own insecurities on you. Trying to make themselves feel better by making you feel bad.

You are beautiful. Whoever you are. You do not need skimpy clothes and tons of make-up to be beautiful. Beauty starts from the inside. It is in the attitude and confidence you have in yourself. Know that no one likes everything about themselves. We all think we have a big nose, big feet..that our eyes are too close together or our ears are crooked. We all think we are too skinny or these days too fat with the media the way it is, too short and we all hate our hair. Just know that if you stand up straight and be happy with who your are, people notice that and that is what makes you beautiful.

Teenage boys think of 4 things – sleep, sex, food and video games. But during them all – he thinks about sex. Men think about sex on average every 7 seconds – so imagine how often a teenage boy thinks about it!

Sex. Don’t do it. Ok – now that I said that- you can’t miss something you haven’t had. I know you are in love and you are going to be together forever – really – see? It’s written on your English folder.  Trust me on this.  I took a survey of 25  people, 10 married their “first” – two are still married. Most divorced within 5 years. So, forever averages 5 years.

Sex. Don’t do it. While the guy fully enjoys it each and every time..again, I took a survey. out of the 15 women surveyed, all having “lost it” in their teens, only one “fully enjoyed it” before their late twenties.  So, basically, why bother?

Sex. Don’t do it. While the guy says he won’t tell anyone, he’ll tell his closest friends – just as you will. You’ll both swear them to secrecy. They’ll tell their closest friends, and swear them to secrecy. Eventually… everyone knows. While sex makes the guy seem like a stud – it makes a girl a slut. Sorry. Just the way it is. Double standards suck. Get used to it. Now you have the reputation. When the forever love ends and you have to get new folders..the next guy is going to expect sex. He loves you. He wants to be with you forever. See? It’s written on your folder.

Now, imagine your 20 year high school reunion. Trust me on this one. Everyone remembers who had the reputation. Believe me. She was my best friend in high school. Though we haven’t spoken in many years, I still take up for her. Is this who you want to be?

Sex. Don’t do it. Here are the clinical reasons. You have your whole life ahead of you. Teen pregnancy is the least of your worries, in my opinion. HIV/AIDS- you can be exposed and if you don’t know it – you can be HIV positive for 10 years and not know it…in the mean time, you are on to the love of your life three or four times…and them as well…

HPV- this STD can cause genital warts. It can keep you from having children. The biggest – it can cause cervical cancer – which can take not only your reproductive ability, but YOUR LIFE. There is no test for men. There is no treatment for men. There is no cure for it. Since there is no test for it in men, and no symptoms aside from genital warts, it is impossible to know if the guy has it. So, he can tell you he is a virgin, he has never been with anyone else. He wants you to be the first. He loves you..why would he lie? Now, you are the one who can’t have kids.

Herpes. Wow. Two out of five – that’s 2 out of 5 – people have herpes – but only 1 of them knows it. It can lay dormant for 5 or 6 years, but still be spread. There is no cure. It can be fatal to your baby if you have an outbreak at delivery and your baby come into contact with it. Herpes is spread both through the genitals and if say, there is a fever blister and then oral contact is made …

There are so many others. Ok – now I can say “Sex. Don’t do it.” over and over, but I know – He loves you!  You are going to be together forever.It says so right there on that biology folder!!!  So – CONDOMS. Use them. They are your friend. Carry them with YOU. DO NOT count on him to have them. PROTECT YOURSELF. If he won’t use them, well, then, he doesn’t really love you. Anyone who really loves you would want you to be safe and care about your health and future. Think about that.

Anything you can do I can do better. I can do anything better than you. ”  A song sung by a girl to a boy. It’s true, most things, we can do just as well as the guys. BUT DON’T DARE LET THEM KNOW IT! Yes, we can open our own doors- but if the guy doesn’t open the door for you – especially on your first date – he shouldn’t get a second.  We can lift the heavy boxes and carry our own luggage, but if he doesn’t offer – he is no gentleman, and that, is not someone you want to be with.

Know how to check your own oil, change your own tire.  Know how to un-stop a sink and a toilet. Better yet – learn how to change your own oil and install the sink and toilet – you’ll rock his world!

Never walk behind him. He’ll expect you to obey. If he let’s you lead, maybe it is a sign of weakness – or maybe you have a cute butt – always walk beside him. Be his partner. You are equals.

It is natural that your father doesn’t like your boyfriend to begin with. You’re his little girl and he remembers what went through his head as a teen age boy. No way is anyone going to try that with his daughter! Be sure to have him come in to meet your parents, shake their hands and have a conversation – this is where the not being quite ready to go on time comes in.  It will give them a few minutes to get to know him and maybe develop some sort of bond with him.  Be home on time, with your shirt on the same as when you left and no hickies (see Sex. Don’t do it.)

Guys – and most men – don’t talk about their feelings and one of the worst questions ever is “What are you thinking about?” Men can truly be thinking about nothing. So when they say nothing, don’t get huffy and think they are keeping something. They are simple creatures.

There are double standards throughout life with men and women. As I mentioned, the slut vs. stud.  Now, I tell you this. I think both men and women should have money saved before they get married. Money that stays saved. Hence, the prenuptial agreement. I know it may seem like that is just preparing for divorce – and well, yes, it is. Being a second wife, I tell you that this is important. Have a healthy savings that he can’t touch – no matter who is at fault for the ending of the marriage. If the marriage doesn’t end – well, think of the wonderful nest egg you will have built for retirement.  I don’t mean have separate accounts in secret, either. That just starts everything off wrong. NEVER keep secrets. You should be able to tell him everything. If not, re think this.

We all have a picture of Prince Charming, coming in on his white horse and riding us off into the sunset and happily ever after. Well, Disney and television have given us distorted views of life and love. It isn’t always Prince Charming or happily ever after. All problem can’t be fixed in 30 minutes and dawn dish soap is just as good as Palmolive. And you do NOT need a Prince (or Princess) to be happy or to save you. Save yourself.

Life isn’t always sunshine and roses, but it doesn’t always have to be thunderstorms and horse manure either. Keep you head, even when your heart is trying to lead the way.


One response to “This one’s for the girls…

  1. Now print it and mail it to your nieces

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